Speed Dating Meets Soul Mating (meets ADULT conversating!)

Spinner is a virtual party, a series of “spins” designed to bring people together! We are here to help you fall in love, get laid and have fun. We believe in the power of LOVE, LUST and LAUGHTER (sometimes all at the same time). Come meet other progressive, feminist, sex-positive, anti-racist Portlanders!

This spin is specifically geared towards those interested in relationships that have an element of ethical non-monogamy (there are as many flavors of that as there are people, so...interpret how you like).

This spin is also geared towards people who lean heterosexual, as there will be gender matching. (ie if you are a man, you will be matched with a woman).

(Like pretty much everything, gender, sexual orientation and relationship configuration are all on a continuum. So this spin is for people who lean heterosexual and non-monogamous- but, there is plenty of wiggle room. Yes, you can show up even if you identify as bisexual and sort of monogamish, or married and interested in an erotic pen pal - there is room for all sorts of possibilities).

*If you are open to meeting people of all different genders, sexual orientations and relationship styles - Spinner Queer might also be fun for you.

**If you are specifically interested in having a monogamous relationship (and lean hetero) Spinner HET-MONO might be just your cup of tea!!

Come find a lover, a soul mate, an activist ally! Bond with a progressive community of like-minded humans from the Anarchist Jurisdiction🌹

We’ll play games, answer questions, get creative, get vulnerable, and yes, we’ll talk about sex. We’ll celebrate our commonalities (and our carnalities!). We’ll learn from each other. And we’ll engage in Pleasure Activism*!

💗🧡💛💚💙💜💜🤎🖤🤍💗

We believe in the power of lust, love and laughter - and we believe in talking about it!

We welcome participants of all ages (over 18!), races, genders and sexual orientations. We invite our differences into the conversations, and encourage curiosity about one another.

❣️LOVE

You may have heard that falling in love is reserved for the one special someone that you are going to spend the rest of eternity with. You may have been taught that falling in love takes time, and discernment, and you can’t just fall in love at the drop of a hat.

We suggest a more generous view.

We believe you CAN fall in love at the drop of a hat, and the world is a better place for it. We just need more opportunities!

Love is not commitment. Love is not a contract. Love does not mean you owe anyone anything.

Love is seeing someone as whole and beautiful JUST AS THEY ARE. Love is being curious about their experience. Love is witnessing their stories and really listening. Love is being compassionate and kind.

You can fall in love for 5 minutes and make someone’s day.

You won’t see eye to eye with everyone you meet. There’s no algorithm in the world that can promise you that. What we seek to create is an environment where we look for the good in every single person, we trust that there is something interesting about everyone (and curiosity goes a long way in finding it) and we practice non-judgement. We ask questions, we don’t offer opinions.

We hope you will make friends, lovers, allies, and soulmates. We hope you’ll meet people you would normally never meet in your daily life. We hope you’ll question your own presumptions, and open your heart to all kinds of people.

We hope you’ll fall in love.

🍑LUST

You may have heard that lust is a sin, that desire is the downfall of humanity, that sex is a sacrilege. We beg to differ. We believe that sex is sacred and creative and that pleasure is the right of every human alive. We believe in sovereignty. Every one has autonomy over their body, and gets to choose what they want to do with it. We believe in consent, in asking first, in honoring no, and in the importance of communication.

Which is why we talk about sex. We need to practice talking about sex until it becomes normal. We live in a culture that says sex is private and bans the conversation from social media (and creates a porn ghetto where conversation doesn’t happen).

We provide a platform where group conversations about sexuality and eroticism can happen. Where we get to show up as sexual beings with stories and fantasies and curiosities and IT’S ALLOWED.

We understand that the topic can be fraught with tension and riddled with shame. We understand that it’s scary to be vulnerable, especially when it comes to sex. We encourage everyone to honor their comfort levels by monitoring their body. You are always invited to take a time out or pass on a question that feels too personal.

You are encouraged to share your experiences, tell your stories, and help normalize all different kinds of sexual perspectives. We seek to educate each other through personal narratives. We are here to learn from one another.

We will talk about flirting and compliments and how to make someone feel good about themselves. We will talk about how nuance is hard and it’s easy to make mistakes. We’ll talk about how to let someone know when you’re not interested. We’ll talk about how to let someone know when you are interested.

We’re here to HELP you get laid.

🍌LAUGHTER

You may have heard that laughter is the best medicine and THAT IS CORRECT.

We believe that sharing laughter breaks the ice, and invites everyone not to take themselves too seriously. We are here to play.

RULES - AGREEMENTS

We are inclusive and kind. We do not tolerate hate speech. We believe all humans deserve respect and to be treated with kindness. We offer the benefit of the doubt. If you are concerned about someone’s behavior, or have feedback about someone, please share it privately with the facilitators.

We will monitor feedback and responses, and take action to remove people from the event on a case by case basis.  We take your safety very seriously. If you ever feel harassed by anyone, please let a facilitator know immediately.We honor each other’s boundaries. “No” is a complete sentence. You are encouraged to take care of yourself at all times.

No one is required to respond to requests. Ever.

We are here to make friends and lovers, and most of all, to connect and have fun. You are a part of that equation!

*Pleasure Activism - on every spin you'll have the opportunity to share what you are working on/volunteering for to help make the world a better place. You can share links and help grow our community's awareness of what opportunities there are out there.

See you on the spin!

Eleanor

Eleanor O'Brien

Spinner PDX, Founder